More than words

Try this with a bunch of friends...

Have them strike up a conversation in pairs, but there's a rule - they have to speak in gobble-de-gook, not normal language! The results are hilarious, but insightful. You find that it's perfectly possible to convey meaning without using real words. You naturally compensate by using more body movements, facial expressions and vocal dynamics.

There's a lesson to be learned here in business. Firstly, communication is less to do with what you say than HOW you say it. Second, unless you convey enthusiasm for your product or service it's unlikely you'll win a sale. And how do you do that? By the WAY you say it. The important thing is for the words and the STYLE of delivery to be congruent - "we have a great solution to your problem" just won't sound convincing if you deliver it flat. Successful communication is about the all-round package - words + style of delivery.

Plain speaking

I stayed in New Mills in Derbyshire a couple of weeks back...and discovered it was HQ for the Plain English Campaign! Now there's a cause worth supporting. If you want a powerful take on plain speaking, take a look at Drayton Bird's blog entry today. It's a little bit...irreverent, shall we say, but gets the point across that so much corporate-speak simply makes it harder to understand what's actually being said. What's the point of using words? Surely, to get meaning across? To facilitate understanding?

Here's a lesson for anyone in business who uses words to communicate. KEEP IT SIMPLE STUPID! The KISS principle works. Don't try to impress with complicated language. It just annoys people.

If you're an inventor with a new product to revolutionise the workplace, don't lapse into techno-speak. Use plain English and talk in terms your audience can understand. If they want more technical information, by all means expand on what you mean but initially it pays to keep the message simple. Impress your audience with what you can do for them, not with the complexity of the language you use.

WIIFM

"What's in it for me?" (WIIFM) is perhaps the most important phrase for the would-be sales professional to have in his/her mind. People are really interested in one thing and one thing only, and that's how your product or service can help THEM. In other talk benefits, not features.

I really like the two key links that sales guru Richard Denny advises us to use. First, 'which means that'... is a great linking phrase that makes us think in terms of benefits. "We specialise in fast, effective teeth whitening which means that you'll soon be feeling more confident about yourself".

Second, try saying "So what?" to yourself after various stages of your 'pitch'. "Our restaurants have highly trained staff." So what? You might then go on to explain that when you ask about various items on the menu, the waiter will be able to give you a full explanation of the dish, which helps you make an informed choice.

People are interested in how you can make life better for them. If you talk to them in those terms, you'll hit all the right buttons.

The Inner Voice

Watching the Speaker TV series the other day reminded me of a recurrent theme in performance coaching - the 'inner voice'. If you haven't seen the programme, it's a Pop Idol-type format but for kids and it's about developing your public speaking skills.

As one of their challenges, they had to present a 2 minute live broadcast from London Zoo - essentially acting the role of a BBC reporter. But one thing really threw them - the producer's voice in their ear telling them how long they had to go. Broadcasters often claim this was one of the strangest things to get used to when they started out, but we have chatter like this in our heads every day, the so-called 'inner voice'.

It's been described as internalised peer pressure and in performance situations it's usually a major hindrance. We usually tell ourselves what we don't want to do, and guess what? We usually get more of that! Sports stars have to learn to control their inner chatter but it's an issue in everyday life too. For some insights into controlling the inner voice, take a look at the Inner Game series of books from Tim Gallwey and Daniel Goleman's book Emotional Intelligence.

Up-selling

"Can I interest you in a £1 giant chocolate bar", the check-out clerk asked as I paid for my goods. Did I buy? Did I heck, but I guess a small percentage of the customers will respond positively to such a suggestion.

There's a difference between true salesmanship and going through the motions. You have to sound as if you believe in what you're selling. There has to be some emotional connection between seller and buyer so perhaps we should look at what emotional responses chocolate can inspire? Why do people buy chocolate? How does the prospect of eating it make them feel?

In the Vicar of Dibley, Dawn French reaches for her largest bible during a particularly low moment in her life, presumably in search of some profound wisdom. But wait, there's a cut-out compartment built into the book containing...a large slab of Dairy Milk!

If you're training staff to up-sell, work with them to develop a conversational style that truly engages the prospect and hits their emotional drivers. Maybe it's 500g of 'pure happiness' or 'the perfect pick-me-up' after a hard day? Make it personal ("I find this really works for me...") or funny ("they say chocolate is the ultimate aphrodisiac...").

People are so used to bland attempts to up-sell that such an approach will be a breath of fresh air. Try it...I dare you!

Buying on emotion

Watching an episode of Dragon's Den today reminded me how much people buy on emotion rather than logic. Two entrepreneurs walked on and gave an impressive summary of their business proposition. Things were going well and the dragons were looking on favourably. Then it all went terribly wrong!

Two things seemed to bug the panel. First, vital information was held back in the initial presentation. They weren't being offered all parts of the business, just the bit that was underperforming. The dragons felt like they'd been had.

Second, presumably in an attempt to impress, one of the entrepreneurs used 'smart language' instead of plain English. It irritated the panel.

At this point the duo was sunk - why? Because they'd caused a negative emotional response in the dragons and there's no way back from there. Trying to be smart and witholding information just makes you look untrustworthy. People respond well to honesty, transparency and plain speaking - never forget that people make buying decisions primarily on emotion rather than pure facts.

Speaker TV series

If you haven't seen this yet, give it a try while it's still around (BBC i-Player if you've missed some). What a great skill it is for kids to be able to speak in public. This series celebrates that skill and it's a fascinating insight into the art of oratory.

Two things struck me as interesting. Firstly, the best speeches come from the heart. Where it's rehearsed and scripted it all sounds a bit phoney. Audiences want something authentic, so they can see into your soul. Then it's a genuine outpouring of YOU. That's why the best speeches involve no notes and few if any Powerpoint slides. Or if you are going to use Powerpoint, use lots of images and no more than two or three bullet points per slide. Use slides to convey meaning and emotion.

Second, the kids are sometimes asked to make stuff up, to speak off the cuff about a subject they've not prepared. Typically this might involve a prop, randomly allocated. This demonstrates your ability to think on your feet, a key attribute of the best speakers. So how would you talk for five minutes about a tin can, or a pair of sunglasses? The best way is to think metaphorically, not literally about the object. What might the object represent? Maybe the tin can might indicate longevity or homogeniety. Or the sunglasses might be used to talk about image or disguise or protection. It's a damn site easier to talk about these subjects now. You've made the link and off you go!

The beauty of it is you're in charge. You can move that in whatever direction you want. It's just a case of having the imagination and the courage to try.

Goals with a health warning

We're always taught about the importance of goal setting, and to be honest, most of us would benefit from it. But sometimes the pursuit of a goal becomes so consuming that it blinds us to the bigger picture. We might be harming key relationships with friends, family or colleagues in charging down a particular road. Marshall Goldsmith brings up this point in his excellent book 'What got you here, won't get you there'.

I'm always a sucker for a movie reference and he uses that classic performance by Alec Guinness in Bridge on the River Kwai' to illustrate his point. Sir Alec plays the ultra-obsessed character Col Nicholson, a man driven by honour and professionalism to build a magnificent bridge for the Japanese (a task forced upon them as prisoners of war). When his fellow officers attempt to blow up the bridge to prevent it being used by their captors, Col Nicholson resists until, in a moment of clarity, he utters the immortal line, "What have I done?".

The pursuit of a goal is fine but not if the price is 'losing the war'. That's why it's a great idea to mentally withdraw to a remote place on a regular basis, a point from which the overall picture becomes much clearer.

The power of not speaking

I've written several times in this blog about the power of oratory and its ability to persuade and inspire. But what about the power of shutting up? If you want one sure-fire way to make friends and have a positive influence on people, it's to develop the power of listening. It's not a passive activity. It's a simple thing to do - ask questions and listen! How difficult can it be? Well quite difficult as it turns out. Trouble is, we have a lot of chatter going on in our heads and we're thinking ahead to what WE'RE going to say next. We just can't wait for our chance to butt in. And besides, it's in our nature to be mostly interested in ourselves.

A rather self-absorbed film actor, reading through the script, once asked his director what he wanted him to do 'in the gaps'. "What gaps?" the director asked. "The bits where other people are talking," came the reply.

But the really great people, the great influencers, are terrific listeners. They have an amazing ability to make the person they're with feel like a million dollars - simply by being totally engaged with them, like they were the only person in the room. Clinton was a master at this.

It's not easy. It takes practice. But it's probably the single most worthwhile habit you could develop to be more successful in life.

Wisdom from Marshall Goldsmith

As someone who's taught golf for a living, I was surprised and heartened to find this quote in Marshall Goldsmith's bestselling business book, 'What got you here won't get you there'. He writes,"I do not use a golf analogy lightly...I am convinced that in the context of helping successful people get better, nothing is more relevant than golf instruction. Golfers suffer all the symptoms of successful people, perhaps even more acutely".

Goldsmith, one of the world's leading business coaches, specialises in helping already successful people get even better. The problem with most high achievers is actually getting them to admit they have shortcomings, a form of denial and self-delusion mirrored in amateur golf where people invariably assume they can hit the ball further and score better than they can. However, according to Goldsmith, "Golfers, like the leaders I coach, have one singularly noble quality: no matter how good they are, whether they sport a 30 handicap or play to scratch, they all want to get better."

Chopping logs

I heard Chris Allen, co-founder of Laterooms.com, use this analogy the other day (orginally uttered by Lincoln I think) - "most of the time we're too busy chopping logs when we should be stopping to sharpen the saw!" In a recession it's the ideal time to pause, reflect and work on your skills and attitudes. Smart people do this. Be one of them.

The art of oratory

If you're in business you have a message to get across. You have to 'sell' an idea to others, to persuade, to influence. Take a look at Alan Yentob's programme on the Lost Art of Oratory via BBC i-Player.

If this is a skill you don't yet possess, there's a serious weakness in your portfolio. Work on it and stand out from the rest.

Making a difference

I met an interesting lady tonight, an accountant - if that's not a contradiction in terms! Let's call her Sue. She told me that when she was younger she'd been told she'd never amount to anything. Her teachers warned her not to set her expectations too high, that her abilities were limited and that life was often full of disappointments. Despite that, she now runs a successful business, is looking to expand and she's being asked to mentor others too.

She told me that a short while ago she learnt something interesting about her past. To earn some cash she used to do some babysitting and one of her former charges had told a friend about this woman who'd really made a difference to her life when she was growing up. This woman had offered her advice and given her the encouragement to do well at school and it had really helped her. And of course that lady was our accountant friend. When this unexpected feedback reached Sue she was flabbergasted, but elated.

Surely, there can be no greater thing you can do in life?

In pursuit of comfort

When I'm coaching someone to develop a new habit, whether a soft skill or a better golf swing, I have to start by taking them out of their comfort zone. The continual repetition of their original habit has taken them into a place where they feel 'at home' with that behaviour. In developing a new replacement habit, we'll experience resistance as the client naturally lapses into his/her dominant mode, especially under pressure. But with continual practice and coaching, the new behaviour becomes embedded and we create a new comfort zone - we've effectively 'moved house'.

But beware! What you're really trying to do is make the new behaviour feel 'comfortable' and on the way, you'll occasionally experience some 'nice' feelings that indicate the new behaviour is bedding in. But that could be because you've lapsed back into your old ways. That's where feedback comes in - from friends, family, your coach or perhaps from recording yourself and playing it back.

It's not easy, it requires discipline and lots of support - but it's worth the effort.

Anticipating new needs

Customers usually have more insight into what they want than you have! Getting closer to them, thinking like them, putting yourself in their shoes is a great habit to get into. But once in a while a visionary comes along and anticipates a need that wasn't previously apparent. Henry Ford once said, "If I'd asked my customers what they wanted, they'd have said a faster horse."

Delivery vs Receipt

When your job is to deliver something it's easy to lose sight of the true purpose of your role - for someone to receive it! When it's something like FedEx it's fairly easy to judge how well you've performed - speed and efficiency is the prime measure. But if your job is to run a reception desk or coach someone in soft skills, the 'receipt' bit is tougher to analyse. People are really only bothered about one thing - OUTCOMES. Go to great lengths to understand what those desired outcomes are (NHS targets don't necessarily produce better care) and direct your focus on providing true receipt. It doesn't matter what YOU think you've delivered. All that matters is how the intended recipient feels.